The Bull And Bear And Bird

Hi again

There are certain items in the house which I unintentionally will often take to use over others. Take for example this coffee mug.

Instant coffee in a bull n bear mug with nasi lemak daun pisang

a well liked combination

Whenever I look at this mug it reminds me of my involvement dabbling in shares.

I am no big time investor and as you can more or less guess from reading my blog I am just an ordinary woman living an ordinary life. Or less than ordinary with my conservative world view and mundane life and yet trying to keep pace with the modern world and of course trying to make what life left in me, interesting while still very much clinging to the past.

The euphoria of the stock market in the nineteen nineties drawn me to join the crowd. The lure of easy money made me part with a subtantial portion of my saving. Without knowledge on market price and valuations I just follow the herd.

In the beginning it was real. Profits made was additional income and adding that to my salary I felt life was at last a little easier.

It allowed me to have some extras.

I could afford to equipt my children with the sporting gears which I thought was best. I did not want my children to be defeated even when the game had not begun. So have the best rackets, shoes and clothings and other things that could boost their ego and confidence and to get them charged up for the match.

Do I sound like a kiasu ha ha.

I knew those things helped but it was more of their determination and love for the sport was what really made them win.

But nobody can deny that money can get things moving.

There was so much happy talk about the market. Many people at the time were smiling and were laughing their way to the bank. Many individuals were giving investment talks and there were some offered their service as fund managers and consultants so you can consult and allow them to hold your money and they could maximise profits for you. Lucky I did not buy their talk cock. Those who did took a long time to get out of depression.

Because soon after due to upheavels in the economic world the market index fell from the peak into a deep ravine and most and in fact all the share prices plumetted and everything plunged and burst.

Many people had their fingers burnt.

Me included. Some felt shy to admit. Because they talked big, talked like clever people advising everybody before that. Hah now?

And sometimes while clearing and uncluttering my house I come across some old bussiness magazines. I have read them before and had believed what the magazine said. How wrong were those investment savvy people. Now after many years when I read it again it makes me laugh.

I still hold a porfolio (a humble one) now but it is littered here and there with non performing penny stocks. Even to get rid of them will cost me money. Some has been delisted but still appear in my account. I think its ok for it to be there so it will keep reminding me not to repeat the same folly.

Due to the shocking experience I should have stopped it all but I like the excitement of involving in buying and selling. I still do but in my very small way and with small limited fund. Excited to watch the graph rising and I shudder at the graph falling. Have something to look forward to. And hoping.

I have become too careful and sometimes fearful very often missing the opportunity to make when selling at the wrong time. But I keep telling myself a little gain or gettting back your money is better than a loss but stubborness in me can turn the gain into loss. Huhhhh.

I like to go on the many investment forums on the net and read the comments there. There were expressions of joy and despair. The self made gurus and consultants are giving free advice. Also squabling among themselves in the virtual world but sometimes I feel they are right there in front . But most time they will make me smile. They are, yes, clever people but many are still so young I guess.

After so many years I still have not improved. If I were I would be wealthy by now and enjoying holidays in some great destinations. But no I am just here and make do with a holiday at home with this camera. Suffice for the simple me. Ok take photos.

Such a tiny bird

Frontal view

This is a different individual no red patch on the head

This has more color and it was making monosyllable sound

The bird is barbet same as here

Ok for now will be back for another entry.

Be happy . . .

Bye . . .

Browse The Album When It Rains

Hello 

The hot dry time is really over. Now its wet.

It comes first with the wind wailing.

The rain then poured and look like curtain  falling from the edge of the roof.

The lightning flashed and the thunder from the sky would clap and whip and crack and boom.

They can make things in the hand slip and drop. If it is glass it will shatter into a thousand pieces. Broken and never can be mended. 

The bad weather, dark and threatening and that can bring on anxiety.

Or is it just me easily get scared and timid. Blame it on my childhood experience.

Growing up in the kampung I lived in a wooden house built high on stilts and it was not very strong such that when we played and ran inside the house the floor would rattle and if you jump the house seemed to shake. Its like what you see when children nowadays jump on the wooden bed ha ha. Of course you would get the yelling too.

The house was surrounded by tall coconut trees. We were always told not to play under the trees because ripe coconut can fall on you even if there was no strong wind. My late mother was unlucky and had one coconut fell on her back. In the old days people did not go to the hospital they let time heal their injuries.

It must have affected her spine because as she grew older her back hunched and much later was found that she had an old fracture at the thoraco lumber region. I was only so small when things happened and did not know anything then.

Sorry I digressed.

As I said the house was surrounded by tall coconut trees you can imagine how anxious we were in stormy weather especially at night and in total darkness only intermittently lighted by the lightning flashes.

The trees would be swaying like pendulums. Some coconuts would fall and when it hit the zinc roof the banging would strike fear in us children as we huddled each other and the elders would be reciting prayer words and not just exclaiming OMG.

Now at this age I should be ashamed as to be so anxious about this bad weather. After all the place where I stay is usually not on the path of the real wrath of nature.

Pray let it remain that way.

I must not be whinning and complaining.

It should not matter if there is no tennis due to the bad weather.

When there is nothing much to do just doodle

Exercise the fingers to relax the mind

Birds from nowhere

Bad weather does not allow for gardening so do it in your computer.

Gardening can kill boredom

When its cold and raining outside it is a good time to browse the album. There may be old photos which can bring back beautiful memories and bring a smile and forget the disappointment brought upon by bad weather.

Here are some pictures from my album. . .

Sit in the corner and do nothing

Happy time meeting friends in fine weather

Rare sighting

Got a companion

There are more old photos I intend to upload in future entries.

So till then . . .

Bye . . .

They Have Taken Over

Hello everyone

I think my earlier guess was right. The hawk which appears since more than two months back around this area has frightened away the smaller birds. Now I see less birds in the vicinity.

The hawk now has shifted to another tree which is nearer to the tree where the pigeons doves orioles kingfisher bee-eaters  iora and others like to come basking and grooming themselves.

Today I saw none of the colorfuls instead another  hawk with dark and dull colored plumage was found to perch on that tree.

So now there are two hawks patronising the area. Although they are different in color and the sound too are different they seem to respond to each other. They must be cousins ha ha.

I think there are more in the belukar behind the tall trees because I could hear similar callings from the back. Some sounded "small" and whinning. There could be a nest inside.

So far only these two are sighted.

Here they are

Its presence cause other birds to disappear

Looks so haughty and dominating

Something caught its attention

On the alert

Always cautious looking over the back

Ready stance

Eyes focussed

Calling out

announcing its presence

 The legs of the first hawk

This belongs to the second

Looking what's behind is the characteristic of the hawk before it attacks its prey

Sharp eyes to spot potential prey    

So these two hawks have taken over the ground. Wonder where the other birds have gone. 

The stronger, bigger and cleverer ones win. Its like that.

Take care,

Bye. . .  

                              

#Black Hawk Came To Conquer

Hi

The graph must be pointing down
From a plateau position
Sleeping through dawn
Waking with a lingering yawn

Hoping for a bright moment
Not to be found
In the quiet morn
broken by annoying sound

Open the window brightness would inspire
and would lift the spirit a little
Its not there
The expanse sombre
Bland and colorless. .

The sound is coming from here

But not the usual chirp chirping or kur kurr kurrr

The high pitched call is from this

Glum

Gloomy

Dull

On the look out for prey

And now!!

Let the sunshine in and cast away the shadows. . .

Be happy. . .

Bye. . .

Mother's Day Is A Day For Togetherness.

Hi all

Happy Mother's Day to motherhood and honor to all mothers.

Got the message on the phone otherwise it could pass without me realizing it. But then what is it so important about the day. Not that I don't remember my mother a woman who had sacrificed to raise me and my siblings.

And many must have remembered the day they become mothers. . .

A Time To Remember

Do you remember
your tummy barely touching the steering when you have to drive the car
and friends were making fun of how big you were

Do you remember
being pushed to the room marked labour
soon after there was a little being in the incubator
a kind of feeling welled out in you and you know you were a mother

And you remember

little feet toddling on the floor
and busy hands reaching out for everything everywhere
there were joy and laughter and love filling the air
fun and feelgood in you the mother

In no time in your midst a teenager the manipulator

sapping away your energy while you juggling motherhood and career
but no surrender
ok ok ok
you're the multipurpose mum the good manager
a superwoman after all

And now the little feet has grown large and larger

fitting the shoes size high in number

walking tall walking away to pursue whatever
and you into dreaming the time of past era

-by me a mother

Mothers are always pictured as loving, caring, selfless, a darling. . .

Me as a mother ? I don't know. But there were times when  I received cards or cake or a makan treat around mother's day so I assume I am being appreciated.

Received this card some years back

It is also good that the day is being commercialized making people aware of its coming and cause them to pause to think about and remember their mothers, those still living or those who have passed away a long time ago. Life have been hectic for everybody in this busy world. What is not in the immediate attention will remain at the back of the mind.

Feel guilty? Don't. All mothers understand.

Let only the niceties and happy moments be remembered. Forget and forgive for any misunderstandings and frictions and bitterness once had. We don't have to pretend there's nothing. Relationship with mother can sometimes be rough.

When under pressure mother can be harsh.

When teaching she can be awfully strict.

Sometimes she adamantly wanted her way.

Children too sometimes indescribably stubborn and insensitive.

Mothers and children are only human all have their own idiosyncrasies.

This is how you do ok!!

Sometimes mother left you

And flew away

Let the heart be clear and mind be peaceful.

And celebrate the day with love.

Love love love in three generations

And cheer the day with a mother's meet.

A time to get together in celebration mooD

Say it with carnations

Happy Mothers' Day!!

Happiness to all mothers . . .

Bye . . .

Watch The #Shrike To Cheer The Heart

Hello everybody

Are you happy with yourself and your life? With people and with happenings around you that affect your life?

Me? Yes and no.

Having living for so long  I can accept and manage to come to term with whatever is supposed to cause unhappiness. I neutralize the minuses to make it positive. Compromise and kau tim. Some of the unhappiness you have got to swallow and because  you live among  people at times you got to make way for them. But if people step on your toe just kick them back. Complaining and whining is usual. Try not to I tell myself.

A child can throw a tantrum if his or her demand is denied. Everybody will come running to persuade her, to coax and to flatter her and do not mind to succumb to her manipulations. The child is lovable, adorable, a charmer.

You one old lady do the same you will only be packed off to the old folks home ha ha.

So we must know where we stand.

I feel as an individual we should learn to be independent although we have children who have no problem to attend to our beck and call. They shouldn't be troubled for they too have their own fair share of problems.

The oldest may not be the wisest and may not be the most knowledgeable. So we should not be dictating others  and expecting everyone to listen. What more if we think so highly of ourselves to the point of arrogance. Children and grandchildren will distance themselves from us which can make us unhappy.

Let us remain lovable .

Sometimes I have many things running in my head.

Thoughts of my future. Don't think you are sixty you don't have a future. What if you live up to ninety. And you are just you and not any ex- king or a statesman with an entourage to accompany.

The most important thing is we should be financially independent.

My thought was as we grow older we can go for less in maintaining our lives. Many things we wanted to have when we were young we think we don't need them anymore. Clothes shoes handbags cosmetic are no more issues. But I was wrong.

Instead at this age we need to spend more for clothing and shoes. Finer cloth to keep our body comfortable and we also want it to look good and to cover our increasing bulge ha ha.

Good shoes with good support are a necessity  to ensure comfort for the feet and the weakening knees. If not it can bring problems to the back. And a bad back can make you grumpy. See?

All good and fine things are expensive.

And the skin care and cosmetic. Do we still need?

Yes yes. I hear a chorus.

The lotions and creams to tighten sagging skin. Foundation and powder to cover blemishes. And thinning eyebrow and thinning hair all need to be attended to.

Oh I forgot. The lipstick to brighten up the demeanor.

Not just any cheapo brand lest the face will look like a parched ground in dry season.

So life can be expensive than before for those who like to maintain their image.

Then the food and the supplements.

Yes a need to keep up with the pharmaceutical development to stay healthy and mmm feel young.

How about the clever gadgets and the up to date gears for the numerous hobbies.

Need to cheer up the heart.

And a car to move around. Make sure you do not have to depend on a chauffeur.

Oh many many more that money can buy and for all these reasons, the need for financial independence.

Materialistic!

No. It is the necessity for the modern old. Part of happiness.

The above supposedly bespoke the heart. Many hearts. Nothing wrong with that.

But in simple everyday living happiness and joy can be found by watching nature. . .

Brown eye shadow

Pose like a model

Relaxing on the fence

 Feeding on a catch

Want for more?

Satisfied?

 Hiding in the bush

Spot a chance

Am being overexposed!!

More in the coming entry. Stay tuned.

Bye. . .